For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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