I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Moan for me like Helen Keller
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
