There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
