Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
