He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize