garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
