She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize