i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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