People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
