if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
