i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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