my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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