I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize
