they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
