So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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