you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
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