We won't sleep together?
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
How does it feel to date your dad?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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