oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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