I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
