Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
