He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
