No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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