Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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