have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I want her autograph on my taint
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
