I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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