"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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