He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
