Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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