Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
