who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
