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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends

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• (416): View more from Ontario

  No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.

  (478): View more from Georgia

  Moment of silence for the loss of that option.

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• (310): View more from California

  He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..

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• (585): View more from New York

  Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class

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• (239): View more from Florida

  Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.

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