Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
