LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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