i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
i believe in u and ur pee
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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