it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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