I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize