hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I need a beard to bite.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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