I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize