im having a threesome with these popsicles
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
