Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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