Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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