I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
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