So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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