I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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