it's too hot outside to masturbate.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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