Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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