I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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