My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Your cock deserves a montage
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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