just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
There's always time for handjobs
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
