your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
