I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
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