You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
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